Wednesday, May 31, 2006
PAYCHECK
This has been of those days which can just simply be called... perfect. Just perfect. And in the perfect fashion, let me present to you the events of my perfect day in a perfectly traditional way - the narration.

After oversleeping, I started the day with an unexplainable sense of happiness. Some cookies and cups of coffee later, I jiggied (Note to grammar geniuses: Correct me if I'm wrong. But nevertheless, that's the perfect word to describe it.) to Dirty Dancing's (I've Had) The Time of My Life, which kind of summed up what I was feeling. Then I realized that I still had a presentation to get over with during that day. But then I also have to prepare myself physically, so my mind wasn't that much packed. Noticing the time, I quickly went to the place where I was supposed to meet my colleagues, which to no avail, didn't actually made sense since they were minutes late. Instead of looking like a man who got stood up to a date, I opted to view my notes for the report. When my friends arrived, I didn't have the stomach to eat such meals in a place where we stayed. Thus, I just had a glass of their bitter lemonade. The time came when my groupmate and I had to leave since we didn't have the luxury of time to stay and chat. Again, it didn't make sense since we didn't start on time due to some delays, which was both good and bad in different ways. After his words of wisdom, our professor returned the "make or break, fight or flight, do or die, life or death" exam which to my surprise, was one of the best results in my college academic life; I got an A. Thanks to that, my ego was overfed, thus, making me spoil my entire part in the presentation, which actually didn't matter anyway. (Haha. Yes, this is my ego speaking right now.) After the class, I met with mom to go to our nation's capital - the very polluted and traffic infested city of Manila. There I went to the office of Mr. Ricky Lo to get my very first paycheck. (Note to life historian: Yes, it's for "Life Belongs To Those Who Wait") Although it wasn't that much large of a sum, I was very, very happy to receive it. I didn't even think I was going to get anything for it, which doesn't actually matter since my artsy side has already been fulfilled just for the plain fact of having my article published on a national broadsheet. I actually don't want to cash the check right now, I just want to store it with my other awards or place it inside the frame where my article is. After that journey, I went to Gateway, specifically to my shrine there - Odyssey, where I was shocked to see that "The Cider House Rules" (which I have been searching for in almost all video stores I have gone to when I started to become a "movie addict" ["Movie addict" isn't the right term. But I can't think right now.]) Immediately, I grabbed and bought it. I then had dinner with my mom where we got to laugh at the misery of other people (Just kidding. Haha.) But we did have some good laughs. After that, I came home, and here I am, savoring the last hours of my perfect day.


PS:
Another reason for this being a perfect day is the new look of Stranger Streets! Large credit goes to Ms. Aislinn "Blogoddess" Kee, the creator of Droozy's Story of the Year, that became Top 4 in the Most Rated List of Blogskins (Correct me if I'm wrong), who personally made it. (Ayan ah, second time mo nang naexempt sa anonymity rule ko. Haha. Thanks also again to Mr. Eric Smith for his previous template of Stranger Streets.
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
SCALES
The eyes
see
what
they
want
to
see.
People judge.
I judge.
I am judged.
All you need
to survive,
this crazy world
we live in,
is skin,
that's
as hard
as a
rock.
Monday, May 22, 2006
THE RING
Inevitably, I may have watched the best episode of Queer Eye. Switching through channels I heard a Latin woman speaking. Her voice reminded me of Penelope Cruz, which ironically, was mixed up into one of my daily conversations with people. So sticked to it and I saw people awaiting a wedding ceremony to begin. There, the couple wed. The couple was made up of the Latina and a US Trooper. Later on it was revealed that the man would eventually leave her wife and their child, going back to the deserts of Iraq. During their wedding, they spoke of their own vows, which they made by themselves. What struck me was the part about the ring, that it symbolizes their love for one another that would last forever, so long as the ring remains bounded. A little bit later, the couple went to a private room. There, the guy revealed a surprise gift to his wife - two pairs of necklace that each had a charm of half a heart, that when bound together, they form one heart. As the 5 gay men shed tears, and gave a toast, the episode ends.

Rings resemble eternity. But what if the ring suddenly became broken?

GRUMPY OLD MAN
I was supposed to write an entry stating how old I feel due to the fact that people talk to me only to consult about their academics, life problems, and other matters which involve my 'expertise'. It feels kind of weird. I'm starting to grow on it. Perhaps I could live with it. So why bother babbling about it?

Secondly, I was also supposed to write about how lonely I feel. That I need someone to share my life with. Perhaps, to love. All those mushy love shiznits. God, I even said to myself that I needed someone whom I could dance with; the type who I could have a romantic moment with (get it?) But as usual, I got pretentious on the way people would nag me about it (as I know they would, after reading this) I don't know. My mind's erratic. At one point, I wanna have that special someone. Sometimes, I just wanna be alone. I need a freaking robot!

Those are the two things I would have written about in this entry. Now that I have expressed that I don't want to write about them, now I have nothing to write about. Thus, ending this entry. (Doesn't make sense? Too bad.)

Oh, I do have something else to write about. About two peculiar dreams I had. The first one I had days ago. It's something about June 11 or so, I dreamt about barbed wires and heavy security, something similar to Martial Law. I dunno if it's foresight or whatever. But hey, I don't want to end like a Ben Zayb in case it does come true. (Haha) The other dream is about me having a daughter. It's weird. Really. Sad thing is that I don't remember the mother. (Haha) Now, feel free to call me nuts. (And no I do not apologize for incoherence or irrelevance in my writing. Yes, I am a grumpy man. Live with it.)
Sunday, May 21, 2006
NORTH, SOUTH, EAST, WEST
Where do I go?

North: Filmmaking (Film director, Screenwriter)
Why? I pity the local film industry. I don't know if it needs me yet I want to make a change.
What steps have I made in order to attain this? Enrolled on a course where one of the graduates who took it became a film director. Joined a film org. Participated in an indie film.
What's wrong? I don't see myself in this field. I haven't done anything fulfilling to say I belong here.
Biggest achievement so far? Directed, acted, penned and edited a short film which was applauded by those who have viewed it. (Litel Mis Pilipings)

South: Writing (Novelist, Magazine/Newspaper Columnist)
Why? I love writing.
What steps have I made in order to attain this? Enrolled on a course where I may become a writer after graduating.
What's wrong? I don't know if I am good at it. I don't know if I am overlooked or whatever. Hell, my English teacher only knew I could write after having my graduation speech.
Biggest achievement so far? Having my article published in the Philippine Star. (Life Belongs To Those Who Wait)

East: Public Speaking (Broadcaster, Documentarist)
Why? I enjoy speaking and imparting information.
What steps have I made in order to attain this? Having been exposed to public speaking.
What's wrong? I stutter. I tend to be nervous.
Biggest achievement so far? Being crowned as the Extemporaneous Speaker of the Year in high school.

West: Politics/Service (Ambassador, Lawmaker)
Why? Leadership is a built-in capability in my system.
What steps have I made in order to attain this? Became president and vice-president of my high school's student council during my senior and junior year, respectively. Taught catechism in my local community. [Believe it or not]
What's wrong? I'm afraid of defeat. I don't want to risk my life in politics.
Biggest achievement so far? Two leadership medals. (President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo Leadership Award and Senator Gerry Roxas Leadership Award)

Indecision is fatal.

PS:
Actually, I just added the "East" to complete the 4. It doesn't matter whether I become one or not. It's just an ego booster. (Haha) However, it cannot be denied that I might end up as one. Who knows?
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
I LOVE A CHARADE!
Cow behemoths cry.
Machetes change bananas' bottom.
Rats beheaded cheese sly.
Beggars flee mattress.
Better ashamed scattered batter.
Spite.
Span ram.
Raffle bait gathered buzzards bewildered spin bells spells spine span ram!
Basilisk stare below bait breath - burned bait.
Saturday, May 13, 2006
PIZZA EATERS
Something new on Kramthologies...


According to co-author, this is something you might consider as information.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
COMPOSITE
Who am I? That's probably one of the most puzzling questions I would not be able to answer in a snap. Watching the ever-popular reality television shows had made me realize that the tactic - "I'm just gonna be real/be myself." may perhaps be the most overused line petty contestants utter before (and in some cases, even after) their fantastic journey begins. They say if you'll stay real and be true to yourself it will make you win a million bucks (or whatever prize is at stake) - It's because people like seeing "real" people, especially us Filipinos who are fond of watching what we call the "totoong tao". But my question is, how real can one be? In a room where you know you are surrounded by numbers of video cameras, how can you assure that you are 100% real. When you know you are being watched by hundreds or thousands of people, could you be brave enough to act without any pretention? And what is the term real even to begin with? This admiration and liking for the real originated because of the emergence of its binary opposite - the plastics: pretentious people who could be like angels in a moment's time then after a flash transform into Satan's loyalists: backstabbing, no good trashbags. I dare ask, dear avid viewer, how sure are you that your favorite "real" person isn't one of the plastics behind the camera or after the show's duration? How sure are you that a plastic is not just making a ploy as an attempt to win you over? Later on after reading the paper or hearing the latest buzz, you'll go on to realize that your hero was a phony. Well, isn't that tragic?

To be oneself is one of the most arduous tasks that one can demand from a person at all times. No matter what you say, you'll always have to wear those colorful masks depending on the company you are with; for sometimes, when you become too real, people don't accept you. It is because of judgment that causes people to wear masks and stay unreal. But sometimes, earing these masks isn't all that bad for you get to become another person, you get to explore and discover new depths that you sometimes never thought of being. When you think of it, sometimes this pretentious act can even help you enrich your personality. I am not saying this act should always be tolerable. I am just pointing out that sometimes it's healthy, even for something as unreal as this. So keep on wearing those masks, for they will help you to be real. And if you go deranged, you can always take them off. Just remember to remember who you really are.

PS:
If you think this was meant to be serious all throughout then now you know that it ain't. I just wanted to see if my brain cells are still intact. However, setting the seriousness aside, I'm not quite sure if I made any sense. Mask! Give me a mask! And now I'm mocking myself, what a pity!
DON'T STOP ME NOW
Minutes ago, I wanted to write a very short story - a spinoff of the life of Agador, the butler from the Birdcage. It's fascinating how a person like I can make a play on a life of a person who doesn't truly exist. It lasted while it could. Besides, I am in no mood to create something crafty. As I have mentioned, my mind is in hibernation.

Apart from this, due to smokes of the past and other circumstances, I felt like writing the way I wrote before - the comic ingenuity firmly placed in between the pathetic happenings of my pathetic life; the kind of writing which I would often show to my colleagues and inquire about their thoughts. It's really amazing and peculiar at the same time, when I think about things I have done in the past. Really. They are.
Monday, May 08, 2006
THERE GOES THE NEIGHBORHOOD
At the rate that I'm going, I might be end up beating the record of Mr. Darcy as one of the most snubbish characters in the world. Thing is, mine's a reality. I don't know what's up with me but during my lonesome escapades where I run through familiar faces, I end up not noticing them. But this isn't intentional. Sometimes, I guess, I phase out. It's because of this weird thinking habit that I end up forgetting that I am living a life in this so-called real world. So much for calling myself a realist.

There is something with solitude that is so therapeutic. Recently, I am opting for a longer span of time with myself than with others. Here's how my schedule goes (weekdays): I wake up at noon to my lonesome, spend the rest of the day until mother arrives late afternoon or early evening, eat dinner and then she goes sleeping, and I spend the rest of the night by my lonesome (once more) until early to middle of dawn. The problem is that I am not occupied with doing something. I'm more of enjoying just being alone. And I have no idea why that is so.

Right now, I opt not to use the word lonesome (although I have in the previous paragraph). It's because despite that I am alone (meaning there's only I, with no one else with me), I do not feel alone. I don't know if you're getting me. (To hell, I don't know who I am talking to.) My point is, although I might be physically alone, inside I am not.

Because of this I have once more proved that I do not need a relationship (right now I don't) I'm just happy with the way things are. If things change, if my mind does, well so let it be. The only problematic in this picture is how long I can keep up doing this. How long can I handle myself just being with myself? (I really don't think I'm making my point here. Am I?)

Let me end this by quoting my beloved Carrie Bradshaw - "Why does one minus a plus one feels like it adds up to zero?"

PS:
My tagboard has been down for quite some time now. What is up with that? (Self demon's reply: It's because nobody's visiting anymore. What's the difference? I know you can handle it. Like you said, you enjoy just being with yourself. Your wish was just granted to another level.)
Friday, May 05, 2006
SADISTIC GLEE
(Note by ego: Wala ka talagang patawad Mark! Kung dati nagsimula sa Survivor tapos nagkaroon ka pa ng own version ng Idol pati Amazing Race, ngayon pati Big Brother!) Yes, you heard my ego right. As if I have all the time in the world, here I go again with another impulse action - accepting an offer (Yes, as odd as it sounds, I was not the proponent of this idea) of becoming the "Big Bro" in this spinoff of the famous reality television contest. Indeed, I now have all the bragging rights to call myself King of Ruizian Reality TV (TV? [Note by historian: Well, if you think about it, we do have video footages of some of the reality "shows" we've had before.])

Having said that, the word impulsive may perhaps be one of my most prominent characteristics. (If you want more proof, try browsing through my archives, most especially the entries during the early days of January this year.)

(Note to blog fans [Note by inner Simon: Again, what is it with the use of the word - "fans". You ain't got any!]) : Again, this is another short post. I have a bazillion things I gotta do before classes begin. And I dare say I wanted a life! Now what have I got?)
BOOS
Want some rye? Of course you do!

I just had a drinking spree (Note by ego: I drink. I do. Occasionally that is. Got a problem with that?) with my cousins (Note to bloodline critic: Alright, one cousin and a nephew [Note to nosy: I'll explain some other time.]) Aside from that we watched 2001: A Space Odyssey. And let me quote my nephew, "Mas nalasing pa ko kay Kubrick." Definitely, watching 2001 has inspired me with originilaty as regards my upcoming work which I am finally (with utmost motivation) trying hard(er) to work on. (Note to critic: Yes, you heard me right.) My one day with tranquility has indeed brought me to greater heights - careerwise (present that is... Not my future dreams of winning... Erm... Forgeddaboutit) Aside from this, I have also been inspired for a new material (Yipee!) which I hope to work on also soon. Well, because of this, I need to work double time because the days aren't getting any longer. My classes are about to begin by next week and events keep on barraging every day. Now when in hell, am I supposed to work now eh?

(Note to blog fans [Note by self anti-ego: as if you have any]: I won't prolong this. I need my much needed sleep. Besides, I have to write my notes for my project [Yes, call it old-fashioned or whatever but I do write manually, ain't it a beaut?])
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
AGADOR SPARTACUS
I'm on an all-time low. I am having a hard time choosing something to watch from my catalog. It's not that I don't like what's in there. It's just that in the state that I am in, they are way too deep for me to have a good time watching. I need a feel-good movie that doesn't make me think hard enough for me to be entertained. So much for my Citizen Kane, Adaptation, Dr. Strangelove, let alone my 2001: A Space Odyssey! I need something like those American Pies which I would just literally be watching. This is something I should put into consideration next time a visit a video shop. And them moviemakers should make more of something like The Birdcage.

Let me quote dear Agador (apologies for the incorrectnes, this is based on how I remembered it): "When will you let me audition again? Why do you treat me like some kind of servant? My father was the shaman of his tribe. And my mother was the high priestess. (Then why did you come here?) They wanted me to have a career. Hello? A career?"
HIBERNATION
Inspirational words for the day: You've got the music in you. Don't let go... You've got the music in you. One dance left... This world is gonna pull through. Don't give up... You've got a reason to live. Can't forget... You only get what you give.

As of this moment, I still could not write.

*War of the ego and self:
Ego: Then what do you call this?
Self: Freewrite
Ego: What's the difference?
Self: I'm just spilling my thoughts.
Ego: What's the difference?
Self: What's your point?
End*

Funny thing, I've been looking for fat books lying around the house with high hopes that I'd be reading them since I have yet to be inspired to write my story which I am supposed to finish by this week but due to this disease I bear (and also a disease my collaborator also bears) we decided that we moved this deadline to a later date. I really cannot write right now... Properly and cleverly with wit (and humor?) I'm still in the aftershock stage. Funny thing is that I don't feel lonely. (And I will not elaborate on this to you, nosy)

Tomorrow, I go on a 24-hour trip, an expedition to bountiful. Hopefully, I'd get my writing mojo back after. I don't know. I just want to rest. Think about nothing. Bury myself in the sands. Be pecked upon by a murder of crows. Have someone take my picture while being a snack so the person might win a prize of sorts.

I can't go on. I'm moving on. I am. Am I? I am. I just can't write. I can't. I don't know why. Do you know why? Tell me. (Note by ego: Oh just shut up)
The Stranger

Kram has moved!
Graffiti


Trails
July 2005
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November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
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September 2006
October 2006
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January 2007
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March 2007
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Detours
Ady
Ais
Alexis
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Bea
CA
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Cheenee
Cheska
Chevs
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Dereck
Ella
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Jan
Joy
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Justin
Kenneth
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Krayola
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MM
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