SOME PEOPLE

If I had the chance to choose the people I could spend the rest of my life with, 50-90% of the people I know will become strangers forever in my eyes. It's a sad truth. I don't know how this came about but I am really feeling so detached from almost everything, everyone. I find it so hard to be pleased, which explains why I do such pathetic things in life. It's not even a question of fulfillment (or is it?) Sometimes I just want to be invisible. Or if humor pervades, I want to have a remote control that would open up a trap door that would help me dispose of people I don't want to be with. The funny thing is that I'm not even depressed right now. I'm actually happy whilst I am typing this - happy with a sadistic glee.

This is the very reason why I love being a writer. I write because I could not speak. I could not speak because I could not express. I could not express because I could not feel. I could not feel because I am empty. Maybe I do need someone to complete me. Just maybe...