A WALTZ FOR A NIGHT

For the millionth time, I want to watch Before Sunrise and Before Sunset again. I don't know what's with this film that keeps on absorbing me to watch it over and over again. Perhaps it's the excitement of strangers meeting and deciding to prolong their chances with one another; but wasn't the same thing shown in Closer when Alice and Dan met? Or perhaps it's the feeling of having an adventure on a foreign land where there's only the two of you and the world; well, this is also true to Lost in Translation as Bob and Charlotte met at Tokyo, isn't it? Perhaps it's the joy of seeing two people with their flames rekindled despite all odds; but isn't Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind a more exemplary film as regards this aspect? Or maybe - it's the simple fact that for me it's the most romantic and most realistic story, that I wouldn't mind it happening in my own real life. (Well, that depends, how REAL my life is; how real do I think everything that's happening around my surrounding is.)

Right now, I'm still tortured by the fact that I wasn't the one who wrote Before Sunrise and Before Sunset. It's beautiful, really, when you think about it. Despite the lengthy conversations, which cover an adult state of mind, it's beautiful in every aspect.

Jesse. Celine. Vienna. Paris. Delusion Angel. I don't know why I'm talking bout this. I'm so messed up, only if I could, I'd create a mirage of a stranger whom I wouldn't mind escaping with; escaping this peculiar and absurd world which I live in. I don't even know people anymore. I wanna drift somewhere, to some place, far, distant, remote, peaceful, where there is no one who could bother me and the person I am with - that is if I am with somebody. Else, I'd go nuts and go talk to somebody like Cast Away's Wilson. I don't know. I need to rest. Take time off. I need someone. And to hell, I don't know who that person is.

I want someone to sing me a waltz - show me that I still exist, even to that person's world. For all I know, I'm just a phantasm floating in this misery mire of darkness, loneliness and isolation. I'm a lost soul waiting to be found.